Projection and well being

I needed to take some time to get into school properly. It’s going alright overall. I got sick last week (and was a bit the previous week) because of the ibs and also because of a bad cold. I was a mess. I was very discouraged and I did not know if I even wanted to remain in school. I was pretty much convinced that I was not up to the challenge and that anyway I was going to fail if I stayed. Despite the fact that I was still feeling fairly bad, I went to a recuperation afternoon last friday. That actually really helped me. I was able to get up to speed and that means that there is a stress less for me. Like I said, I am doing alright; I still have a lot of anxiety when I am in class, but I can somewhat manage it. I try to just stay in the moment instead of projecting myself in unhappy situations and then start to panic. There is no threat for my life, that is what I keep telling myself. I’ve realized because of therapy that I do this on a regular basis, projecting myself in moments where I felt hopeless and scared. So I have tried to remember moments where on the contrary I felt beautiful, in control, at peace, in the flow… I think that If I start to take the time to go to those times and places where the feelings are positive, I will be able to improve my quality of life. I haven’t really been able to test it yet, but I think it is a good idea. Maybe I could set a moment when I go to bed to project myself in these happy settings. I would give me the occasion to relax and would possibly even improve my sleep. Maybe also, I should try to somewhat conteract the intrusive negative thoughts, the projections in traumatic moments, with those positive ones. I think I am on to something… Well, one thing is certain, I need discipline in some ways in my life. I am still working on that. Trying to change my actions, my habits to better ones. It is difficult to make it stick. I have done some Wii Fit, but not everyday. Part of me is disapointed but another one is simply thinking that at least I make efforts and that when it is spring, I will be walking to school and back everyday. One step at the time. I think I want to put my efforts on projection a bit, then I’ll come back to physical activity.